I can remember when I first saw the trailer for Zombieland I thought “Either really cool or really bad.” As a bit of a buzz surrounded it and most of it seemed to be positive, expectations were raised. I finally got around to watching it on the weekend and I can confidently say it measured only slightly short of what I was expecting. The movie was fun, a lot of fun actually, but that’s all it had going for me.
The story follows Columbus, named after where he is heading, as he goes about creating a system for surviving the zombie apocalypse he’s found himself in. He gets by from neurotically following his list of rules with an OCD like obsession. Along his way he meets a fly by the seat of his pants bad ass, Tallahasse, the girl of his life, Wichita, and her little sister, Little Rock. Together they fight to survive and along the way realize that there might be more to this apocalyptic world than just surviving.
I actually really connected with Columbus. He’s a bigger wimp than I would expect after killing so many zombies, but he’s a shut in hopeless romantic who’s just looking for that missing piece in his life. You do have to be willing to believe the fact that the most unlikely guy on the earth to survive zombie after zombie actually has, and that this shut in of how ever many years actually has a great cardio enabling him to run and run and run. I guess if he started training as soon as the shit hit the fan. Tallahasse is the exact opposite of Columbus. This would be the guy I’d bet all the chips on. And they actually do a good job of playing off one another. Good so far. Let’s talk about the ladies. The sisters are a couple of con artists that get by from tricking people into helping them, taking everything of value from them, and then leaving them for dead. This never sat well with me. A lot of their actions seemed unbelievable for a couple of sisters in a zombieland, they were the same before the world changed as they were afterwards, and I wouldn’t of given them nearly as many chances as Columbus and Tallahasse did. At one point I actually wish Columbus and Tallahasse had just moved on without them cause they were the more interesting part of the story for me.
All that aside and the fact that the story never really had a focus apart from killing lots of zombies. There was a lot of laughs and a lot of good old fashion zombie kills and killings in this film. Complete with the scariest freaking zombie clown I’ve ever seen, and a special appearance from a certain iconic comedian that is well worth the price of admission.
Best Line: “You can’t trust anyone, the first time I let a girl into my life she tries to eat me”
or Tallahassee, “I’m not great at farewells, so uh… that’ll do, pig. “
Columbus, ” That’s the worst goodbye I’ve ever heard. And you stole it from a movie”
Best Weapon: Banjo…for Dueling with a zombie
First Bite – 48 secs
Zombie Bite Count – 5
First Zombie Kill – 6 min 41 secs
Zombie Kill Count – 62